Chapter 162
Chapter 162
Midnight is over the moon with the food her mate has provided for us. I roll my eyes as she urges me to praise him. As if Knight needs the insane ego boost she wants me to grant him. Consuelo takes our plates away, and I’m starting to feel a little full. This has been a really fun experience, and everything has been delicious so far.
I still haven’t fully grasped the fact that Knight is going to be taking Ayrie with him for as long as he is. I’ve always noticed how different the twins are, but I never thought they’d ever grow apart. I knew that their paths would be very different, but I never fully grasped the severity of what it would mean for them. The werewolf occupation is a lot heavier than any other job.
“I should have left the trip thing for last,” Knight says after a long moment of silence. “The last thing I wanted to do was upset you.”
“I’m not upset. I’m just-” I shrug, “I rarely have time to slow down and think about things. Ever since I’ve met you, I’ve had these moments when I’m able to turn off my fight–or–flight instincts. I’ve never had that before. No one has ever helped me to where I could wind down this way, and I was kind of always grateful for that. Thinking about shit sucks.”
“Winding down doesn’t always have to be thinking about things we can’t change, Angel. Trust me when I say that shit will hurt you.”
“I know that. It’s why I don’t give a lot of things a second thought. But the kids are different. I guess I had this idea of them. I never had real siblings, and! guess I thought if anything were to ever happen to me, they’d always have each other.”
“Nothing is going to happen to you, and they do have each other. They always will,” he shifts uncomfortably in his seat.
“This is different. Alpha training is a whole lot different than what you’re training Ayrie to do. I understand what you’re trying to do and what you’re trying to prevent. However, they’re both so used to us being together. I’m concerned about how it will affect their relationship with us. It’ll seem like
favoritism to both of them.”
“I know, but a little rivalry between them is healthy.”
“You mean how you and your sister absolutely hate one another?”
“Ash and I have very different reasons for the way we are. It’s different for Ayrie and Aizen,” he immediately gets defensive.
“How?”
“They have you. You raised them in a way that brings them together, Ash and I never had that because I was affected by the changes the vampires did to my father. He’s gotten a lot better, but he wasn’t like this when we were kids.
“What they did to him fucked him up. He was harsh, and we had a reward system in place. Obviously, being the strongest between the two of us, I was always ahead. She became aggressive, and at the time, Buddy had a firm grip on the wheel. I’d let him do whatever he wanted. Appeasing our dad was more important than being a kid.
“It got to the point when she would try to belittle our mom. She’d call her weak, and she’d snap at her whenever she tried to help or comfort her. We’d fight because of that. Whatever we were doing never involved our mother. My dad encouraged her behavior. He didn’t like how attached I was to my
mom.
“To him, we were soldiers. He needed us to be prepared for anything, and there was no room for anything else. By the time he gave me that order, Ash hated everything that didn’t involve his influence. To this day, she follows his lead without question. The twins will never face that kind of pressure. We’re teaching them, not giving them orders.”
“I never had to think about stuff like this. I just want them to be happy.”
“I know that. It will be hard on all of us, but at the end of the day, they’ll both know we’re here for them and that they can come to us whenever they need to. That’s important to me as well. It’s why I’ve been trying my best to accommodate the two of them.
“I am taking Ayrie to the art museum without Aizen, but that doesn’t mean I’m leaving him out. We do lots of things together. He loves being around Elliot and my mom. He loves the pack life, I see it, and I want him to have that: The two of them can’t share the throne.”
“What if they don’t want to do either of those things?” I ask.
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08:42
nu, 12 JUNI
Chapter 162
“You’ve been fighting going near the pack from the moment you found out you were a Rizen. Yet, you’ve been taking baby steps to improve it, not just as the Rogue Queen, but the alpha that is Midnight. It’s an instinct we can’t go up against.”
“You fought it.”
“Not really. I left because I didn’t want my father’s pack or my mother’s pack to fight against each other. I didn’t want to take over the Alpha King’s throne. A lot of people would have died. A lot of people died to get to where I am now, including the entire senate of the former Rogue King. It would have been worse at court. The houses would have fallen, Nothing would have been okay afterwards.
“Istill did my best to ensure both packs had what they needed, and when they needed my help, I never hesitated to extend a hand. The syndicate also helped me a lot. When I first started, it felt like I had something to believe in again. A place where I wouldn’t be taken for granted. Things didn’t turn out the way I wanted them to there, but for a long time, they were the home I needed to keep me centered.
“I hate to bring this up because Perry has been in my ear about it, but I hate to see you struggle with this. Would you like to go with her to therapy? I think it will help with the transition a little better. Ease some of your worries to help you out of those human instincts lingering in there.”
“Isn’t Perry different from us?”
“Yeah,” he nods. “She’s a Lycan, but before that, she was a werewolf, and we’re very different from them. Very, very different. There are times when she struggles with the way things are with them, and she wants to make changes. Kind of like you and the mortals under our control.”
“I have a huge problem with that.”
“I know you do,” he grins. “But it is what it is.”
“Okay, I’ll think about it and I’ll talk to Perry. Does that make you feel better? There is a whole bunch of stuff you have to worry about, and I am not one of them. I’m good. I just have to wait for human Phoebe to catch up.”
